A woman goes to confession:
"I’m so sinful, father!" she says.
"Tell me about your sins, daughter."
"Every time I look in the mirror I think, ‘I’m so beautiful, I’m so beautiful…’".
"Go in peace," the priest says. "It is no sin, my daughter, it is a delusion."

"Who is this handsome man?" the little boy asks his mother, pointing at the picture of an athletic young man with a full head of dark, wavy hair.
"That’s your father," his mother says.
"Then who is that fat, bald man who lives with us?"